


An Imprint on My Soul

by Strypedpolkadots



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-13 01:23:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13559691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Strypedpolkadots/pseuds/Strypedpolkadots
Summary: "He was fond of you, Grant Ward""And I'm glad he's  dead"But why? Why is it that I am glad he is dead? Is it like those moments, when you put down a dog because their quality of life is so bad that it is a mercy to let them die.





	An Imprint on My Soul

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! 
> 
> So I have never posted before, but after Ward died I guess I was emotional because he is my favorite and I sort of got a moment of inspiration and wrote this. I just recently found it on my phone after totally forgetting about. I know I intended to write more but as I don’t know where my mind wanted to take it I thought it was best to leave it short and sweet. 
> 
> This is not edited, it is basically a rough draft/stream of consciousness, so feel free to point out any mistakes. 
> 
> Hope you like it :)
> 
> Disclaimers at the bottom

"He was fond of you, Grant Ward"   
"And I'm glad he's dead"

But why? Why is it that I am glad he is dead? Is it like those moments, when you put down a dog because their quality of life is so bad that it is a mercy to let them die?

"You were brainwashed"  
"So was Ward, we make the perfect pair"

I guess when I said I understood I didn't really, not yet, I got it, I could figure it out but until that moment I was on my knees begging to be apart of Hive again I couldn't understand. Grant went back to Hydra in his darkest moments, when he felt hopeless. Everything with my mother was not enough for me to understand, it only helped me empathize. But what a pair we really make, who cares about the brainwashing, just the simple lack of love in our lives and our seeking that which we believe resembles it. He with Garrett, I with my parents, he replaced love with power, I replaced it with a parasite. Kara, Lincoln, I want to say we both loved them, they at least loved us, we accept the love we think we deserve, how true, these relationships were the epitome of settling. But the one thing I never realized, it didn't matter how much we loved and were loved, none of it mattered because it didn't come from those we wanted it to come from. When Thomas rejected him and my mother rejected me the idea of love changed, those who should love us, the love we thought we deserved abandoned us. I'll never know if I loved him and maybe I will never know. He was once a part of my life, good or bad our orbits revolved around each other and now it will be no more. He may not be a part of my life, but he will remain a part of my soul, an imprint that may forever influence my sphere of understanding. 

**Author's Note:**

> All characters are property of Disney/ABC/Marvel 
> 
> Any thing in quotation marks is directly from the Agents of Shield Television Show on ABC 
> 
> I also believe there is bastardized version of a quote from The Perks of being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky somewhere in there


End file.
